Cuba's Latest Whopper

January 27, 2010
Cuba's Latest Whopper
By Humberto Fontova

The U.S. Defense Dept. "caused the Haiti earthquake with electromagnetic
shock-wave bombs," reports the Castro regime. "Iran is Next."

Intrepid bloggers at Babalu Blog discovered the stunning revelation
above in an exclusive article on a website run by the Castro regime
titled Verdades de Cuba (Cuban Truths). Russian intelligence, we learn
upon reading, recently arrived at the determination and vouchsafed it
(apparently exclusively) to their vital Cuban allies.

It seems that the Russian Northern Fleet -- in particular its flagship,
the Peter the Great -- has been closely monitoring U.S. Navy hanky-panky
in the Caribbean for two years now. "Lately the U.S. has made tremendous
advances in their Earthquake weapons," report the Russians via the
Cubans. U.S. satellites allow for the aiming and concentration of these
powerful radio frequencies, which harness the natural interaction of
forces between the ionosphere and the earth's fault lines.

An ultra-secret unit within the U.S. Defense Department codenamed
Project HAARP (High Frequency Active Auroral Research Program) is the
central culprit, we learn, and has diversified its line of lethal radio
frequencies to produce floods, droughts, and hurricanes, along with
earthquakes -- of which the Haitian is in fact only the latest.

Only last month, Project HAARP unleashed a demo earthquake near Eureka,
California that registered 6.5 on the Richter scale. And the May 2008
earthquake that shook Szechuan China and registered 7.8 was also the
handiwork of the U.S.'s Project HAARP.

Long suspicious of the U.S. Caribbean fleet, the Russians were tipped
off when Lieut. Gen. Ken Keen of the U.S. Southern Command was deployed
to Haiti before the earthquake. This proved that the Yankees well knew
the devastation they'd unleash and so wanted to invade Haiti "firstest
with the mostest," as the saying goes in U.S. Army lingo. These U.S.
"boots on the ground" under the camouflage of "earthquake relief" will
soon replace the U.N. peacekeepers completely and nail down the
long-planned Yankee colonization of Haiti.

The Russians aren't quite sure whether this is the last demo quake. Some
Project HAARP-induced hurricanes and tsunamis may also be in the offing.
But they're convinced that once the tests satisfy the Yankee military
cabal with their powers of electromagnetic sonic destruction, Iran is in
for it. The U.S.-created Haiti quake will appear a trifle in comparison
to the U.S.-created Iran quake.

So who could possibly believe this, you ask? Actually, in light of his
record in this regard, I'd say Castro has good reason for optimism. To wit:

He's convinced many of the "enlightened" worldwide that:

A: the U.S. maintains a strangulating commercial and aid embargo against
Cuba.

When in fact: For almost a decade, the U.S. has been Cuba's largest food
supplier and among her top ten trade partners. Just last year the U.S.
racked up $708,000 in sales to Cuba. Plus, for a decade, the U.S. has
been Cuba's main donor of humanitarian aid, including food and medicine.

B. His regime provides all Cubans (and many in the third world) with
free and exquisite health care.

When in fact: As befits a nation with a higher per-capita income than
half of Europe, pre-Castro Cuba's infant mortality rate was the
13th-lowest in the world (lower than in Germany, France, Japan, and
Israel, among many other first-world nations). Today, it ranks 40th from
the top, with most of the nations behind Cuba in 1958 now far ahead.
This current infant-mortality rate, by the way, is also kept
artificially low by an abortion rate of 0.71, the hemisphere's highest
(and hovering among the world's top five for the past two decades),
which "terminates" any pregnancy that even hints at trouble. Cuba's
suicide rate is also currently the hemisphere's highest, triple its rate
during the unspeakable Batista era. More tellingly, according to a
report by the Association of American Physicians and Surgeons, more than
75% of "doctors" with Cuban "medical degrees" flunk the exam given by
the Educational Commission for Foreign Medical Graduates for licensing
in the U.S. Most Cuba-certified doctors even flunk the Educational
Commission for Foreign Medical Graduates exam for certification as
"physician assistants," making them unfit even as nurses.

C.) pre-Castro Cuba was a sniveling U.S. plantation.

When in fact: Of Cuba's 161 sugar mills in 1958, only forty were
U.S.-owned. And United Fruit owned only a third of these. And according
to the U.S. Chamber of Commerce, in 1958, U.S. investments in Cuba
accounted for only 13 percent of Cuba's GNP. And all through the '40s
and mid-'50s, more Cubans vacationed in the U.S. than Americans in Cuba.

D.) Che Guevara was a cunning and valiant guerrilla fighter.

When in fact: During the Bay of Pigs, Che's only wound came from
shooting himself in the chin with his own pistol. Four years later in
the Congo, while planning a military campaign against crack mercenaries
commanded by a professional soldier who helped defeat Rommel in North
Africa, Che confidently allied himself with "soldiers" who used chicken
feathers for helmets and stood in the open waving at attacking aircraft
because a "muganga" (witch doctor) had assured them that the magic water
he sprinkled over them would make .50 caliber bullets bounce harmlessly
off their bodies. During his Bolivian "guerrilla" campaign, Che split
his forces, whereupon they got hopelessly lost and bumbled around,
half-starved, half-clothed, and half-shod, without any contact with each
other for six months before being wiped out. They didn't even have WWII
vintage walkie-talkies to communicate and seemed incapable of applying a
compass reading to a map. They spent much of the time walking in circles
and were usually within a mile of each other. During this blundering,
they often engaged in ferocious firefights against each other. Then,
when cornered, Che dropped his fully loaded weapon and whimpered, "Don't
shoot! I'm Che! I'm worth more to you alive than dead!"

So again, I'd say Castro has room for optimism. "Hey," he's probably
thinking, "millions swallowed all the lettered items above? Who's to say
they wont swallow the U.S.-made earthquake?"

American Thinker: Cuba's Latest Whopper (27 January 2010)
http://www.americanthinker.com/2010/01/cubas_latest_whopper.html